MARGIENARY

The second week of our four-week Hebrew Extension Learning Program (HELP), a partnership between WP and WWIN, officially wraps up today. And yes — the students are all still alive, still smiling, and already able to read Hebrew. That alone is a miracle! Just 10 days ago, our 16 brave students couldn’t tell a Hebrew letter from a random piece of teak wood. Today? They are reading verses straight from the Book of Jonah in the original Hebrew and actually understanding what it means. Either the Holy Spirit is speeding up their brains or these students are secretly geniuses. Probably both. 😁 Actually, it is the effective teaching style of the teachers, the diligence of the students and the guidance of the Holy Spirit.  Of course, it hasn’t been easy. The Lord has shown His amazing grace… while also allowing a few #characterbuildingadventures: - Electricity played hide-and-seek the whole week (mostly hide). - Water was scant, I made sure to wake up around 3am, and to be sho...

The me of 10 years ago (okay, maybe 5) would have come here and raise hell and rant about whatever it was she thought was a wrong done to her. She would have been cryptic but obvious, careful but blunt, emphatic but sarcastic, and offensive but right. Now, she is still cryptic, she is still careful, she is still sarcastic, and she may still be right. But this is definitely not a rant, rather a prayer.  Lord, let not my life be one that takes Your Name in vain. Let my service be sincere, let my words be true, let my motives be pure, let my patience be long, let me not be stressed by the inconsistencies that I see in others, the mistrust I discern, the unbelief I perceive. May every breath I take be a prayer and gratitude to You for the grace and purpose you have given to me.  And may I love you back with all my being May my sole purpose in life is to give glory to your Name. 

I have always been an insomniac since my nursing student days. It got worse during seminary days and the thinking process that goes into Bible translation can make the wheels of your mind turning and churning deep into the night so having 4-5hour sleep most days is good and normal. Therefore when suddenly you start sleeping like the dead, unable to get awaken by sounds of lawn mowers or chainsaw right outside your window or people almost yelling at you trying to wake you up, and bones and muscles that seem to lose their strength for no reason, catching yourself napping in the middle of the day when for years and years you haven't been able to, a headache that never seem to stop, dizziness that is so severe you feel like your world is just a top being spun over and over, it could absolutely scare the daylights out of you.  So to the doctor I go hoping to get clarity on all these symptoms and I aside from the usual culprit that is stress and anxiety, with my lowest blood pressure rea...

At the beginning of the new year, I started making my travel plans, and booking my flights to conduct the BT workshops that are part of the implementation program of the organization. But being a Northern Luzonian, I am not that well-versed with the manner of transportation in the central Philippines. So I booked my flights thinking that from the venue of one seminar, I can just ride a taxi or a jeep or a tricycle just like I have done in the past in other parts of the country and I'll be able to catch my scheduled flight. So before I came to Bohol last week, my mind was operating on the assumption that after the workshop in Siquijor, someone would just take me to the airport to catch my flight to Manila, forgetting the fact that this is Visayas. This is the part of the Philippines where each province is an island of its own. So I needed to take a Ferry to get to a larger city to get to my designated airport. Well, thankfully, I have been informed a few days before it w...

The day before yesterday, I was invited by my ***Utol Norman S. Malcat to share the Word to the family and employees of one of his millionaire friends. ☺️   I was apprehensive to go as I never really had any experience talking in front of rich people, let alone teaching quite highly educated people. I did stand many times in the past before people more knowledgeable than I am, but it has been usually to talk about particular translation topics that I usually am knowledgeable about and for which I have truly prepared and studied. I also do speak almost every Sunday before an audience that may include one or two people who have more academic training than I have but they usually are my friends or they quite know me personally, so last Tuesday was truly a getting-out-of-your-comfort-zone kind of situation and so I was downright terrified. My mind was at 15% Okay-Whatever-I'll-go, and 85%-Ay-Uray-idtana! (NO WAY!) The schedule was postponed twice because of my health c...

My addictions are weird but I think these are not unique to me.  I have three addictions and I am very glad that I have overcome one of them, at least for now.   #SUGAR_ADDICT  Over a month ago, I was probably one of the worst sugar/carb addict there is.  Since I was diagnosed with diabetes almost three decades ago, I went into a rollercoaster of dieting and fasting and binge eating.  I would weigh myself, get disgusted with what I see and resolve to eat nothing for a week. I would lose 10kg, then the following week, I would eat all the calories that I restricted myself from and more.  Then in April of last year I tried the ketogenic diet and it was working for a month or so until an aunt commented that I will get all wrinkly and saggy if I lose too much weight and my mind used that statement as an excuse to go back to my standard way of eating which has always left me feeling and looking bloated, inflamed, fat, and ugly.  It also aggr...

April 2001 I woke up early this morning and went straight to doing my weekend chores...like hanging a two-week worth of laundry under the sun (before the sun is up), afterwhich I went back to bed to do some reading. Three hours later, my mom came and said, "Men ina-no? Ollaw law!" (Are you ready? We're about to leave!") I was confused for a moment then I realized it's the first Saturday of the month and I need to be somewhere to teach. It totally slipped my mind as my mind was still all over the place from Xami's stay in the hospital and then traveling right after it and coming home again. I changed and put my things in my backpack and was gonna put on my shoes only to realize I don't have any appropriate shoes. I asked the hubby if I can try one of his and a pair looked not so bad as the others. So off we went with me looking like I have boats attached to my feet rather than shoes. I used the lesson that I prepared for a women's conferenc...

For Sunday School at church this morning, we talked about how there was no proper room for Jesus to be born in the first Christmas, and how even today, if we are honest, our life is so full of activities and busyness that oftentimes we give hardly any room for Jesus in our everyday life, eventhough we say or think that our activities are for the most part "in the service of the King." And here am I, either too pain-addled or too busy with life that I have not even greeted anybody a Merry Christmas except for those who greeted me face to face and I uttered the same in reply. So here I am thanking all of you,  friends and family for your friendship, prayers and just thankful for your lives and for being a blessing to me.  Here is to praying also  that  all of you be blessed beyond measure this coming year and that our God will give us all plenty of opportunities to be joyful in Him as we worship and serve Him in our lives.  A blessed Christmas to all!...

Today, just like all days, if I know how and choose to recognize it, was a day of God's providence.  Hubby was on his way out of town so my morning was busier than most of my other mornings because I have had to mind my child who is an early riser, like his dad.  Usually, he and his dad are already ready for the day before I open my eyes in the morning.  I also had another thing to prepare for today, as I was scheduled to go to one of our villages up in the mountains for a day of fellowship with fellow Christian women who gather every month to study God's Word and encourage each other.  Since my previous days were riddled with health challenges and work, my mind has been telling me to ask someone else to speak at the gathering.  I am sure someone would have been willing, but I made a promise with my King that as long as I am able,  I will not miss this monthly teaching opportunity for any reason other than if I really am unable to talk, walk, or...

# MY_APOLOGIES BUT #NO_TO_STRESS When it rains it pours, they say, and it's true. I got rained on by too much negativity today. I am not making excuses, it is just that when you start feeling a tightness in your heart and you can barely catch a breath, you feel like at any moment, you'll start seeing your whole life in 4x5 frames just like how people say it happens when you're about to leave this reality. I'm telling you, it can really get to you. I have been getting harassed by text messages from a store in town demanding that I pay for a product that I have already settled a long time ago. Like I received lots of anger-inducing messages in the last few months and I and others have told them again and again to check their records because an auditor already came and made comparisons with my receipts and their receipts at sinabi pa niya na okay na, cleared na ako. Pero text pa rin sila ng text at paliwanag naman ako ng paliwanag ng katakot-takot. Tapos kanina ay nagte...

#RANTS #MCAI   So when I heard that GMA was doing a reimagination of Rizal's Noli Me Tangere, I binge-watched the whole thing (ep1-15)  and saw each succeeding episode daily thereafter. It has been mostly fun until it wasn't, at least for me.  I feel like the showrunners are bowing down too much to the pressure of fans.  I don't care much about the ships, in fact anyone can end up with anywho and I'd be fine with it, even happy, although if I am honest, I do not see/feel/hear any chemistry between the book Ibarra and the book MC as acted in the series; heck there is even more chemistry between the two Maria Claras when they are together in a scene compared to the supposed couple.  The chemistry between Klay and Fidel is undeniable, yes. Yet the chemistry between Klay and Ibarra is definitely palpable.  I wonder if this was done deliberately, na sinadya nilang walang chemistry si Dennis at Julie Anne? Like do you feel anything when they...

The week that led up to the checking of Psalms for a language in the coastal town of Isabela has been unbelievably tight. Add to it the 2 weeks of checking while managing an ongoing house construction, two meetings with bosses and colleagues, hearing a news about a good friend having a stroke_ and the stress of it all seemed to have done me in.  For the last three nights, the heart acted up again, with its scary chest tightness, and the chest pain of course came with its sparring partner, hypertension. I have been trying to get my blood pressure to a safe level the last two days, but until now, I still feel like the scalp on the back of my head is being pulled off and my skull feels like it is being squeezed too tight.  We truly praise God that we were finally able to complete the translation checking that had been in the works for the last few months.  Due to unforeseen circumstances such as sickness among the translators, schedules that can't be synched, dis...

I am of the mind that in His grace and mercy, God almost never give us what we deserve, as in I deserve judgment for my sins, but I got His love, forgiveness and free salvation instead; I don't deserve that mercy but He gave it anyway.  However,  I believe that sometimes, when I am not ready for something great, when I am too blind to see the good laid out right before me, or when I refuse to acknowledge God's intended blessing for me, or when I am too bullheaded to recognize that which is for my own good, and instead choose my own way, THEN He lets me have what I truly deserved... which could be not necessarily harmful or evil, but could sometimes be just a 'whatever'... a status quo...  At other times though, what I deserve could be totally detrimental to me, and God may let me have it just so I'd realize that I erred big time. The problem with this, when God lets me have what I deserve because I so desired it and might have even done ungoldly things t...

Some of my random thoughts that have never seen the light of day until now. Here goes nothing. Let me talk about myself and my mother.   People say I don't look like her because I look more like my dad. My older brother and my youngest sister look more like her. She has a no-nonsense outlook in life.  She is not much into humor; in fact often times she needs jokes to be explained to her. She has the kind of personality that usually puts people off because she is strict, serious, and usually immovable when it comes to ideas that she already tried and decided on.  She decides whether one thing is worth doing again depending on whether they worked or failed the first time, and once she made up her mind about something, it would take short of a miracle for one to get her to  change her mind.  When it comes to accomplishing what needs to be done, she is your person. She gets things done so fast and so effectively that she wants everyone to work at her speed, bec...

#𝖯𝗎𝗋𝗉𝗅𝖾𝖤𝗇𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗌 #𝖿𝖺𝗂𝗍𝗁𝖿𝗎𝗅𝗍𝗋𝖺𝗏𝖾𝗅𝖾𝗋 #walangmagawa 𝖬𝗒 𝗅𝗂𝖿𝖾'𝗌 𝖻𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝗈𝗇 𝖺 𝗉𝗎𝗋𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗃𝗈𝗎𝗋𝗇𝖾𝗒 𝖶𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝖨 𝗅𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝗎𝗉 𝖻𝖾𝗒𝗈𝗇𝖽 𝗍𝗁at 𝗉𝗎𝗋𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗌𝗁𝖺𝖽𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝖻𝖾𝖺𝗎𝗍𝗒 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗅𝖾𝗌𝗌 𝖻𝗅𝗎𝖾𝗇𝖾𝗌𝗌 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝖬𝗒 𝗌𝗈𝗎𝗅 𝗌𝗈𝖺𝗋s 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝗅𝗈𝗎𝖽𝗌 𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗏𝖾𝗅𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖺𝗍 𝗆𝗒 𝖾𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗇𝖺𝗅 𝖽𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗒. 𝖠𝗍 𝖺 𝖼𝗋𝗈𝗌𝗌𝗋𝗈𝖺𝖽 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗆𝗒 𝗆𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗂𝗌 𝗌𝗍𝗎𝗆𝗉 𝗈𝗇 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖽𝗂𝗋𝖾𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇 𝗆𝗒 𝗁𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗍 𝗌𝗁𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝗍𝖺𝗄𝖾 𝖨 𝗅𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝗉𝖺𝗌𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝖿𝗎𝗌𝗂𝗈𝗇 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖻𝖾𝖿𝗈𝗋𝖾 𝗆𝖾 𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗅𝗂𝗏𝖾𝗅𝗒 𝖻𝗅𝗈𝗈𝗆𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝗉𝗎𝗋𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝗂𝖽𝖽𝗅𝖾 o𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝖼𝗄𝖾𝗍 𝗌𝗐𝖺𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝖺𝗌 𝗂𝖿 𝖺𝗌𝗌𝗎𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗇𝗈 𝗆𝖺𝗍𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗋𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗌, 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗆 𝗈𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝗂𝗋𝖾𝗌 𝖨 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗀𝖾𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝗋𝗈𝗎𝗀𝗁 𝗂𝗍 𝖻𝖾𝖼𝖺𝗎𝗌𝖾 𝖨 𝖺𝗆 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗇 𝗌𝗈𝗅𝗂𝖽 𝗀𝗋𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖽. 𝖳𝗁𝖾𝗇...

I think that being a "professional faultfinder" (specifically a translator and a translation checker here, and possibly in the ASD spectrum) is disadvantageous to relationships. :-) Having been trained in the science and art of translation and translation checking where the key is to communicate an intended meaning in the most accurate, natural and clearest way possible, my tendency is to try to understand the meaning of a communication completely and exhaustively as possible. I think that this is the reason why a lot of times, I find myself finding implied information in people's statements which later on they would claim that they did not mean to imply; but to all my senses, the implications are too obvious one could not mistake them for anything else. At other times, in my effort to become very clear in my communication, hopefully to have no room for misinterpretation, people find my conversations too specific, too detailed and therefore cumbersome because it is t...

One habit I have when the clock strikes midnight is to make sure my glass slippers don't fall off my feet as I run to the... hahaha!!! Seriously, what I do is that I look at my Facebook posts memories and see what was up with me all these past years.  Lately I have been seeing lots of angsty poetry both in English and Kalanguya.  It is a bit encouraging for me to look back and realize that I am in a better place now in terms of my health, biopsycho-spiritually, I mean, if my writings from years ago were to bear witness about my "now and then."  Here is one that I lifted from today's memories.   One angstsy Friday... (a repost from years ago) In my moments of stupidity… sometimes, I wish I never knew You so that I can just hate people who make life unbearable.  When I hurt, I wish I never knew You so that I can just wallow in my pain  and not acknowledge the fact  that You’ve suffered worse pain than this so that I can be freed from everything incl...

I have a few more reading assignments with deadlines that have come and gone and yet I still could not get myself to a point where I have the least bit of inclination to read and then write something about what I have read.  So what I have been doing was procrastinate by doing other less demanding (well, that depends on one's favourite thing to do) tasks in terms of brain energy usage; i.e. checking a written and an audio translation of books from an OT and a NT projects in the country and researching and writing Bible Study materials for adult Sunday School, teaching online seminars a few days a month.  Yet even then, I am barely accomplishing what I have set out to do this year.  Anyhow, things are getting done at a slug-pace but I guess I should thank my lucky stars (not that I believe in things like that) for the fact that my conscience still does a number on me every time I get into my most depressed, most sloth(y) season in life, which forces me to work for my daily...

No longer am I scared of the darkness The midnight blackness that you see when you look in my eyes Are just shadows left by years of sleepless nights And the ghosts of my past that used to haunt all of my waking moments. But now, I don't have to linger and play hide and seek with my demons Because you've kissed away my pain, healed my wounds, until Nothing is left, not even indiscernible scars on what had been my wounded soul I've shed all the tears I can cry; now, my eyes are dry. In these pages, I've poured out all my heartaches Written them all down in blood between these lines Bravely, I have fought my battles, and it's true, I did lose some But my goodness, you are my witness that I have won the war. I am here with you, after all, alive and real, red ink is zinging in my veins All set to write new stories, or even rewrite old ones if I get the chance To create new memories, or reminisce about the good old times, With you and our lives that the Heavens chose to ...

I grew up in the villages of Nansiakan and Mapayao Kayapa, Nueva Vizcaya, Philippines at a time when everyone treated each other like Family; everyone's mom was called auntie even if they were no relation. 👫 We were never carried in strollers but we had a better ride in the form of our mother's or grandmother's "kayabang" (basket carried on the back with an "oyon"). Our playground was the rice field, following along behind the water buffalo as our dad plough the field. As early as 7 years old, we were responsible little persons that our parents trusted us to take care of our baby brothers and sisters when they were gone for a whole day working in the farm a considerable distance away, and they knew we would make fire, boil rice and feed the baby with the rice-water or cooked porridge if our sibling is a toddler or take our baby sibling to the neighbour for breastmilk if the baby gets hungry before our mom gets home. At 10 years old, we were expected to ...