MARGIENARY

During my birthday this month, my friends and colleagues serenaded me and the first song they sang was one that is called Faithful Friend by Twila Paris. One line in the song that I remember says, "I will never put you on a pedestal." And my mind went, "Why not?" But then the next line in the song says, "For we both know the glory is the Lord's." All in all, the song was good, and I should not fail to mention that I love the melody. But that is not the main reason why I am writing this blog. The reason was that I have personally proven this month that the worst thing one can do, both to oneself and the concerned person, is to put someone on a pedestal. Just like the song said, the pedestal belongs to the Lord alone. We can hold people in very high honor but we should never forget that they are human beings too... fallen human beings just like me and you. It is therefore unrealistic to expect people to stay as perfect as the person we have ma...

I’m confused.  I have been a mound of angry muscles, veins, and bones and arteries who if not reined in would go about virtually biting people’s heads off. When you died and been brought back to life, I would think you would be gentler. You would look at the world and everything in a whole new light. Well, I don’t.  I am angry at the doctors for making me go through that when they could have prevented it.  I am angry at my body for being such a messed up clump of cells that cannot even function the way it is supposed to. I am angry at my health for being such a pain in the neck. I am angry at the people who bring work to my door when they know that I need to rest. I am angry at friends who just see me walking around and standing on my own two feet and then assume that everything is fine now and they can treat me without the slightest bit of sensitivity and consideration. I am angry at people who think they are encouraging but actually irritating. I am angry at the dishes...

I almost asked my husband to take me to the ER today, (although from past experiences, the ER in the hospitals in this side of the world aren't that encouraging either) after I felt a sudden chest pain, weakness in my limbs, dizziness, and nausea, which are all indicative of a heart attack.  Now, why in the world would I get a heart attack? Well, yes!  I am not the healthiest person, but heart attack?  So I decided to wait it out a little and see how it goes, telling myself to breathe in and out because it came to a point where all my awareness was focused on the crushing pressure on my chest that makes it so difficult to breathe. I voraciously searched the net for any possible diagnosis of the symptoms I was presenting and came across a forum where people with similar symptoms posted what their doctors found out (or mostly what they did not find out) and some remedies they've tried that somehow alleviated the discomfort.  A lot of them said it might be trap...