Showing posts from February, 2010



Life is not so unkind after all
When you’ve gone away
Everything for me was just
A blurry perspective.

After ours had fallen apart
There was no getting over you
You’ve torn my heart into shreds
‘til I found out there is life after you.

Thanks for breaking my heart
Thanks for betraying my trust
Thanks for pushing me out of your way
I never have found him
If not for all that you did to me.

Now that I’m up and about
Here’s a love worth living for
You may not believe this
But I love him more than
I ever loved you before.

(Another song that was a lie at the time it was written. It only came true four years later.)
Here i am again
Wond’ring about everything
Did i really left
Or just been here all along
Dreamin’ about you.

But here i am still
Wide awake and thinkin’ about you
Pretending that everything’s goin’ fine
As the sun rises from the east
I will do fine.

I know you’ve made up your mind
And i’m sure you’re not coming back
When we broke each other’s heart
Destiny has planned it
From now on
We will always be apart.

Wherever you are
In case you’re thinking about me
Always remember
The love we have shared
It was in the past
but still in memory.


(This is a song I co-wrote with a friend of mine. I wrote the lines after I accepted the fact that what R&I had was irrevocably over. But when my musician friend read it, he wrote a music.)


In the waters of fantasy the shadows march
As the dark waves of dreams keep twirling in an arch
The rivers of joy had long been dried up
Peals of sorrow struck like a loud thunder clap.

In the depths of the grave the ghost awakes
As the leaves are gathered, and the fire awaits
Tears were shed as the heavens cried
Drowning not the grief as it tries to hide.

In the fires of anger hope burnt away
As the hands of bitterness grip the heart all the way
Slabs of unforgiveness blocks the mind's highway
Blocks all the hurts, but keeps happiness at bay.

(Written for a friend who cried his heart out to me because of a love lost.)


Altar of my Heart

My breath you gave me back
Snatched me up from the quicksand of death
My love of life were leaves in autumn
Waiting for the winter’s night to take me home.

Yet you’re the sand in the seashore that tickles my toes
You are the whites and the reds of the rose
Your love caused my soul to hibernate
When it’s all ready to shutdown and crash.

You set up a home deep in my heart
To live again on a fresh start
You are the flame that lights my path
A love offering in the altar of my heart.

(I wrote this while with Ex-No.2. Most of the lines are for God, but inspired by what I feel at the time for A.)


Love can’t be this bad, can it?
Yes it can be when it comes to me and you
Me? Well, I’m not missing you
Cuz I wake up at 5:30
Take a bath at 6:00
I eat noodles at 6:15
And dress myself up to 6:45
Preparing my notes follows
Then off to school at 7:15.

I listen to teachers’ chit chat
From 7:30-12:30
I eat my lunch at 1:00
Shuffle the cards or wash my clothes
Scan my notes, chat with my roommate
Crack jokes and laugh at supper time.

I prepare myself for bed
Brush my teeth and wash my face
Turn off the lights, wear sweaters and socks
Draw the covers over me
And sleep like a baby ‘til 5:30.

Now you tell me how can I miss you
When I keep a very busy day?


You thought your life is a wilderness
But in your heart, I found an oasis
And our love has grown and thrived
When you welcomed me inside.

I dreamt of sharing your awesome desert
To keep its rugged beauty in my heart
To be blinded by its raging sandstorms
And to leave my footprints in its sand dunes.

A north wind will blow and even out my prints
But before that, may you come back to reminisce
And see the two of us frolicking in the sand
As we wish to ride the sunset hand in hand.

But here we are, the sun has risen in fury
Will you let it burn us in such a hurry?
Why not build a shelter that would shade our hearts
So that even in the desert, we could make it last.

these lines were written after a big fight that resulted to a cooling-off, that resulted to a break-up... with whom? i don't seem to remember... ;-)

Still for R

Heavens eyes has bestowed a smile upon us
More so that He took your hand to reach me out
Alas, miles and oceans come between us, but LOVE
As strong as the waves permeates our hearts
Love conquers all, once again… proven without a doubt.

Romance, haven’t I turned my back on you? Haven’t I…
Locked my heart away, never to let anyone break in? But now,
Granted, I have fallen hopelessly for him.
Gone with the wind, as Scarlet said, were my heartaches and fears
Interlude of joy, intense longing, my heart cries out to be with him.

Each day is a gift, a promise to keep
Everlasting love, memories to cherish
I pledge to you, I will be true, I will stay
Pure, until the day, you
Reach my hand and vow to love and keep me…


I was thinking about changing the face of this blog to fit the valentine mood of the month but I thought back at how it bored me in the past when I tried to put back my links and other features in the page, and so I decided against it. Perhaps it would be better to do a series of blog on love. But then I thought again, and there was really nothing I could write about the subject that the great poets and great novelists and playwrights have not already written. What then am I to do when I am second-guessing myself at every idea that comes in this shell of mine? Well, maybe a few stories about the loves of some people I know, but then I would need permission to do that. That made me decide that I'll just share some moments in the times when the three great loves of life happened. Hah!

I got this idea when it occurred to me that in the last few months, my exes were able to get in touch with me and the friendly talks we had had kind of helped me to lay my ghosts to rest. As in ev…