MARGIENARY

You were like the sun Rising from the far horizon A sure source of light The picture of perfect delight. You traversed the cloudless sky Shiny and perfect in my eye So why did you become the moonlight Casting dark shadows in the night. A thorn in my flesh, a pebble in my shoe The wrinkle in my brow, an arrow in the bow Energy-zapper, loneliness-giver Tear-causer, heartbreaker. Why do my tears have to run dry? Why do my days have to be dreary? Why does my heart needs to bleed out? Why do I have to be in the outside looking in? Why do you have to hurt me over and over? With a treatment that is colder than the worst winter. I bless the day you became to me like a mother, I curse the day you became a green-horned-monster. May I never become like you ever...  My tears will keep falling, my heart will keep breaking Because... You have ruined everything that is good in you and me. Author Unknown mY Synapses...

Barren hills of sadness and pain Skies of emptiness and rain Amidst it all the sun hasn’t shone So mourn, oh heart! Death came by your door Ended the pain and crosses he bore He is gone now, life’s not our own We've lost, feels like, yet he has won. So for now... Just run, my heart! No home for you here Sing your sad song, cry your bitter tear Gales of sorrow in this sea of horror All around you, darkness and terror... but pray, In the night, a moon will be born. Alas, my heart, stop your cryin' Soon, a flow’r will bloom in the rain.

Di ko alam kung matatawa ako sa inis o manenermon ako sa kaasaran dahil sa isang dating kaibigang nagbalikbayan pagkatapos ng halos labim-pitong taong pamamalagi sa bansa ng mga pinaghalong puti at itim.  Sino ba naman kase ang ang hindi mabuwibuwisit eh may edad na siya nang iwanan ang Pinas ngunit pagbalik ay hindi na raw marunong managalog?  Anak ng tinola!  Kung si Rizal pa eh, nangangalingasaw na isda ang katumbas n'yan eh! Heto nga't nangangamoy na rito!  Maigi sana kung bata siyang pumunta doon at maari ko pang patawarin.  Hindi ba niya alam na nakakabanas lang ang ganoong pag-uugali? Malayo namang kahanga-hanga ang isang taong lumilingon sa pinanggalingan kaysa sa taong ipinanganak dito, saka umalis, at pagbalik ay pinagmamalaki pa rin na siya ay Pilipino.  Hay naku!!!! Puwede ba!?!!!!!!  Kahit anong gawin niyang padaanin sa ilong ang Ingles niya, hindi pa rin puputi ang balat niya! Buwisit!  Buti sana kung tama ang balarila niya at pagb...

Last night in the middle of a downpour A visitor knocked on my backdoor She was wearing a shroud, tears brimming in her eyes I was waiting for her the other day But unexpectedly, she came yesterday Grief. Shrinks say that I should embrace her Because holding her hand is letting go That talking about her will heal my soul Crying because of her is healthy And ignoring her is folly But what do I know? She grips your heart and you cannot breathe She blinds your eyes with tears and you cannot see She makes you stare into nothingness and you cannot think She embraces you and you cannot break free. Maybe time is indeed the healer Yet I know from before, Grief leaves you never She goes, and back she comes like a lover Yet she offers no solace, not even a pray'r. So weep, my soul Tomorrow is another day...

Last night in the middle of a downpour A visitor knocked on my backdoor She was wearing a shroud, tears brimming in her eyes I was waiting for her the other day But unexpectedly, she came yesterday Grief. Shrinks say that I should embrace her Because holding her hand is letting go That talking about her will heal my soul Crying because of her is healthy And ignoring her is folly But what do I know? She grips your heart and you cannot breathe She blinds your eyes with tears and you cannot see She makes you stare into nothingness and you cannot think She embraces you and you cannot break free. Maybe time is indeed the healer Yet I know from before, Grief leaves you never She goes, and back she comes like a lover Yet she offers no solace, not even a pray'r. So weep, my soul Tomorrow is another day...

Kalay i patey, to li kaikdag i hawang To kaomaha lay timpon nalabah Nem to katekwa lay masakbayan, Hiyayan kan da ay biyag, ni tayo panyahyahyahan Hina-dom waday gaya, nem wa-wa-day ligat tan panlinggayohan No pampilli dakiho, hapa piyan tayon manta-olid yan biyag mowan? Halamat et ngo ay tokiho hindak ni Nallagan hi-gatayo Isunga anggan kindaw To lay biyag ni anhemek tayo Amta tayo ngo dadan ay ag mahammah Apo Diyoh Hota annan palano To, hiyaman i kustokusto. Panggep ni degeh ni kamalekna panggep ni naandi lad ya Amon dakel i kamaibbagga ni kan ta ay kalay anhan dama To anhan la binigla, nakol igyan ma-noy agyat ni wada Kan ta kayman ngo ay mabaybayag od pay na-mo Nem hipay pahding tayo, makakonhi-gan biyag Kan to ay inggato law diyan aboh. Halamat ngo dadan Apo, ni timpon indawat mo Kaanohan ni ama, hi-gami nangiptekan mo, Dakel ni sakripisyo noman i impatibew to Kuston ogali tan pahding ni pambiyag, hiyaman i impatawid to. No waday nebbeng ko ni mangi-ittak ni hakey too Andi adom n...

My dad died today. It was so sudden, my mind is still reeling at the suddenness of it. He was ok, one moment, and now he's gone. I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that he's gone!

For a few days, I abstained from logging on to my Facebook account and if I did, it was only to update my status. As a result of my absence, some people wondered. One of the people who kind of got worried was an ex-boyfriend who has become a very good friend and his other ex girlfriend who was also an old friend of mine in High School. So when I finally got back in circulation, I heard that my EX is coming back to the country very soon and that he wants to see me and his other ex and his old friends. I told my old friend (who does not know that I am also an ex of her ex, lol) that I won't be able to make it so she'll have to give Mr. Ex a hug from me. And then she panicked. And I don't know why... :) I was just thinking, it's funny how life turned out for the three of us. I used to be so jealous of my high school friend (but you see, I was the one who brought them together when I learned that my friend has a crush on the guy. The guy and I used to live in the sam...

If History is a man and he is sarcastic, I am sure I would hear him say, "DUHH!!" to me over my reaction concerning all the circumstances that I have been obsessing about in the past weeks.  He'd probably would have said, "Come on, we've been here before, we've heard those words before, in fact, one too many times in the past, it was hurled at us, to the point that if I am a diary, this was already a repetitive entry, but the world didn't end with it!  We're still here, and we're okay!  And I can't understand why you're letting it bother you so!!" Be at rest, be at rest, my souL For the Lord has been good to you! So today, I choose to thank the Lord.  Thank You Lord Jesus for enduring my incessant rain of complaints, and even the thunder of anger and frustration over events and words that are beyond my control that most often comes with the downpour. I'm still the weakling that I am so please take a hold of my mind and my h...