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Showing posts from 2009

Luke 1:68-79

Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, for he has visited and redeemed his people, and has raised up a horn of salvation for us in the house of his servant David, as he spoke by the mouth of his holy prophets from of old, that we should be saved from our enemies, and from the hand of all who hate us; to perform the mercy promised to our fathers, and to remember his holy covenant, the oath which he swore to our father Abraham, to grant us; that we, being delivered from the hand of our enemies, might serve him without fear, in holiness and righteousness before him all the days of our life. And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Most High; for you will go before the Lord to prepare his ways, to give knowledge of salvation to his people in the forgiveness of their sins, through the tender mercy of our God, when the day shall dawn upon us from on high to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace.

Belated Birthday Dinner

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Sayang, I was not able to take a picture of the dish I cooked for the first time today but here's a look-alike courtesy of this webpage.   It was a belated birthday dinner for B.  We had 10 guests (three of whom are below 10 years old) hehe, my cousins who are always the first to taste my experimental dishes.  (Experimental in sense that they are recipes that I have never tried before.)  We had a baked chicken drowned in a mixture of butter, honey, and prepared mustard, plus a sprinkle of curry powder, and salt.  My, my, was it so good, my young cousins were fighting over chicken bones. Hmm, where is Christmas?  For some reason, Christmas is a bit off base for me this year.  I put up my Christmas tree as early as September to help me get into the 'Christmas mood' but I can't seem to get into it yet. There've been lots of activities and some major setbacks which had probably caused this lack of Christmas spirit.  But Oh well, it doesn't matter... that's

a belated birthday dinner

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Sayang, I was not able to take a picture of the dish I cooked for the first time today. It was a belated birthday dinner for B. We had 10 guests (three of whom are below 10 years old) hehe, my cousins who are always the first to taste my experimental dishes. (Experimental in the sense that they are recipes that I have never tried before.) We had a baked chicken drowned in a mixture of butter, honey, and prepared mustard, plus a sprinkle of curry powder, and salt. My, my, was it so good, my young cousins were fighting over chicken bones. Hmm, where is Christmas? For some reason, Christmas is a bit off base for me this year. I put up my Christmas tree as early as September to help me get into the 'Christmas mood' but I can't seem to get into it yet. There've been lots of activities and some major setbacks which had probably caused this lack of Christmas spirit. But Oh well, it doesn't matter... that's just a feeling. The reason for the season is not for m

a birthday dinner plan and a horrible picture

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It is 1:03AM and this is just another sleepless night. I sooo feel very sick today due to a picture in Facebook that a cousin had commented on which in turn appeared on my screen when I checked my facebook page today. I cannot seem to shake the image of a little boy's body in a dirty plastic basin, with his intestines hanging out of his bare tummy... and with his little head in another container! What sick sick person would do such a thing!!! At first, (and even until now) I was telling myself that the photo was probably photoshopped. But then it seems too real as there are no visible signs of manipulation. It is just soooo UNTHINKABLE! People who posts pictures that are so graphic like that specially in webpages like Facebook should do necessary precautions not to subject their friends or the friends of their friends to a viewing of it without consenting to view it. I wasn't meaning to look at it but it was a picture so my eyes naturally gravitated to it, and it was rig

a birthday dinner plan and a horrible picture

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It is 1:03AM and this is just another sleepless night.  I sooo feel very sick today due to a picture in Facebook that a cousin had commented on which in turn appeared on my screen when I checked my facebook page today.  I cannot seem to shake the image of a little boy's body in a dirty plastic basin, with his intestines hanging out of his bare tummy... and with his little head in another container!  What sick sick person would do such a thing!!!  At first, (and even until now) I was telling myself that the photo was probably photoshopped.  But then it seems too real as there are no visible signs of manipulation.  It is just soooo UNTHINKABLE! People who posts pictures that are so graphic like that specially in webpages like Facebook should do necessary precautions not to subject their friends or the friends of their friends to a viewing of it without consenting to view it.  I wasn't meaning to look at it but it was a picture so my eyes naturally gravitated to it, and it was r

SM and us pipol

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So Bong and I decided to ride to Solano on his bike to eat lunch yesterday and to check out the new SM grocery store (yes, not the SM Mall, just the Savemore Grocery store)--if they have my favorite Golden Crown butter (which, to my dismay, they don't), and to see if they have the Pao Tsin Dumplings station (I'm so thrilled they do).  We decided to eat lunch at the Food Fiesta Restaurant in Bayombong and then went on to Solano afterwards. There were loads and loads of people that I just bought frozen green peas, bought some steamed dumplings and ran out from there gasping for fresh air.  On our way home, Bong made the observation that the many people there were not really buying anything.  Most were holding a piece of Nova chips or clasping a bar of bath soap, and none was really pushing a cartfull of stuff as one would expect.  I even saw a frozen 2kg Purefoods Hotdog shoved in between cans of infant formula and other stuff shoved into the wrong places, as if people were just

Christmas & Broken Hearts

My heart is bleeding today for a cousin of mine whose 'fiancee' is getting married to another. I just got a call from him asking me what happened. Yes, asking me what happened because I was kind of the one who was in communication with the girl while we were all waiting for her to make her decision. The decision we were waiting for was the "yes, but not right now" kind of thing. We did not expect that it was going to be a "No, because I'm getting hitched to another man!" I just can hear the hurt in his voice and I can kind of feel his pain... so intense, and inexplicable that I do not know what to say to comfort him, so I just told him that I was so furious for him when I heard the news. What do you say to someone whose heart is breaking right at the moment you are talking to him, and whose dreams of family shattered right before your eyes (or ears)? What can one do but have her heart bleed too. If it hurts me so much like this, how much more for

My 3 Cs (my Culture, my Cousin, and my Carbonara)

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The Kalanguyas have a cultural practice called "Tanga" (with stress on the first syllable). This is done by inviting oneself into the house of another for a meal. In the past, when somebody comes to your door and that person says he is 'timanga,' you don't have a choice but to let him in and feed him at least three meals. They are usually children but usually, a parent accompanies them. I remember when I was a little girl, I had a pet chicken. One evening, we had visitors, a young boy and his mother. I was surprised because my grandmother was hurrying to cook rice when we usually eat sweet potatoes for supper. My grandfather also was burning chicken feathers on the fire. The next morning, after breakfast, the mother and son left, with my pet chicken tuck under the young boy's armpit. I went to my grandmother and cried my heart out. She explained to me that the boy wanted my chicken. "Tinang-an to," she said. So I learned that one cannot r

Today's 3C's (My Culture, my cousin, and my Carbonara)

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The Kalanguyas have a cultural practice called "Tanga" (with stress on the first syllable).  This is done by inviting oneself into the house of another for a meal.  In the past, when somebody comes to your door and that person says he is 'timanga,' you don't have a choice but to let him in and feed him at least three meals.  They are usually children but usually, a parent accompanies them.  I remember when I was a little girl, I had a pet chicken. One evening, we had visitors, a young boy and his mother.  I was surprised because my grandmother was hurrying to cook rice when we usually eat sweet potatoes for supper.  My grandfather also was burning chicken feathers on the fire. The next morning, after breakfast, the mother and son left, with my pet chicken tuck under the young boy's armpit.  I went to my grandmother and cried my heart out.  She explained to me that the boy wanted my chicken.  " Tinang-an to,"   she said.  So I learned that o

A la Julie&Julia

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While my B was in Manila some weeks ago, I received a text message from him asking what would I like as a pasalubong. I told him to just buy me anything, and he said there is nothing called anything anywhere in the mall so I told him to buy me a movie that he thinks I would like. So he came home and my pasalubong was a DVD of the Julie and Julia movie. I enjoyed it although I found it dragging in some parts but still I was impressed with the premise of cooking a whole cookbook and blogging about it. One recipe that stuck to me after I finished watching the movie was the beouf bourguignon. It's probably because I was fascinated with the name. It sounds to me like a procedure that people at the salons do to your hair. :) So after the movie, I googled Julia Child, read up on her, then googled the beef recipe and studied at least four versions of it. I thought it would be something interesting to do so I saved the webpage and promised myself that I'll sacrifice a week budget when m

A la Julie&Julia

While my B was in Manila some weeks ago, I received a text message from him asking me what would I like as a pasalubong. I told him to just buy me anything, and he said there is nothing called anything anywhere in the mall so I told him to buy me a movie that he thinks I would like. So he came home and my pasalubong was a DVD of the Julie and Julia movie. I enjoyed it although I found it dragging in some parts but still I was impressed with the premise of cooking a whole cookbook and blogging about it. One recipe that stuck to me after I finished watching the movie was the beouf bourguignon. It's probably because I was fascinated with the name. It sounds to me like a procedure that people at the salons do to your hair. :) So after the movie, I googled Julia Child, read up on her, then googled the beef recipe and studied at least four versions of it. I thought it would be something interesting to do so I saved the webpage and promised myself that I'll sacrifice a week budget whe

my name is Liv M. Ealone

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Well, of course that is actually "LEAVE ME ALONE!" WARNING: Read at your own risk! So I was having a peaceful time reinstalling Translators Workplace and repairing some of the installations on my computer so I can go ahead and finish up the back log of the last few days' assignments when I received a text message. (I was also doing laundry in between.) The message was the usual how-are-you-I-hope-you-are-well kind and so I replied with the equally usual I'm-great-I-just-had-a-tooth-pulled kind of response. Then another reply came telling me that it would be good if I start doing this and that, and that did it for me! For goodness sakes!!! It's Saturday! Give me a break! All I want to do is close my eyes and do no-brainy things like laundry and all that! (Oh, I would have to have my eyes open for that, I guess!) But you get my meaning! So anyway, I replied that I can't start doing what they're asking me to do until the workshop I have been participati

My name is Liv M. Ealone

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Well, of course that is actually "LEAVE ME ALONE!"  WARNING:  Read at your own risk! So I was having a peaceful time reinstalling Translators Workplace and repairing some of the installations on my computer so I can go ahead and finish up the back log of the last few days' assignments when I received a text message.  (I was also doing laundry in between.)  The message was the usual how-are-you-I-hope-you-are-well kind and so I replied with the equally usual I'm-great-I-just-had-a-tooth-pulled kind of response.  Then another reply came telling me that it would be good if I start doing this and that, and that did it for me! For goodness sakes!!!  It's Saturday!  Give me a break! All I want to do is close my eyes and do no-brainy things like laundry and all that! (Oh, I would have to have my eyes open for that, I guess!) But you get my meaning! So anyway, I replied that I can't start doing what they're asking me to do until the workshop I have b

only you can.wmv

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for my dearest Best... Only you can love me this way...

books&i

I was hovering over a library counter yesterday where lots of sci-fi, mystery novels, and thrillers are on display. After a while, the lady at the counter looked up and saw me flipping the pages of some of the books. She said, "Hmm, so you like science fiction. I don't like them!" "I have read some, but they're not my favorites," I answered wondering if B will be thrilled with the mystery ones and thrillers.  I know he loves war novels.  The lady raised her eyebrows because it was obvious by the way I was stacking the books that I have a plan to take them with me. I've bought some books from the same library before so I know that they will only cost me a negligible amount. I don't know but it seems silly to me to pass up owning good novels when they only cost 5pesos a piece. So I asked the librarian to put the books in a box as I run to my room to get some money. Now, I just finished marking the books and I looked at the shelves of novels and other

books&me

I was hovering over a library counter yesterday where lots of sci-fi, mystery novels, and thrillers are on display. After a while, the lady at the counter looked up and saw me flipping the pages of some of the books. She said, "Hmm, so you like science fiction. I don't like them!" "I have read some, but they're not my favorites," I answered. She raised her eyebrows because it was obvious by the way I was stacking the books that I have a plan to take them with me. I've bought some books from the same library before so I know that they will only cost me a negligible amount. I don't know but it seems silly to me to pass up owning good novels when they only cost 5pesos a piece. So I asked the librarian to put the books in a box as I run to my room to get some money. Now, I just finished marking the books and I looked at the shelves of novels and other books that I have bought the last six months (not to mention those that were given to me by frie

Christmas Tree and Flowers

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Wow, I have neglected this blog for a long time that I don't think anyone comes here anymore until I read a new comment on the previous entry. Well, my cop out for not writing anything here for months (Is it months?) was because I have been terribly busy as everyone else. Honestly, after I lost my baby, I associated blogging with heavy emotions. So since I did not want to 'feel' for a time, I stopped writing blogs (although I did write everything from teaching materials, my husband's sermon outlines, to scripts). But boy, did I miss blogging and the interaction with readers that sometimes comes with it when your friends feel oblige to acknowledge that they did read what you wrote (hehe). I decided to write something today not because I have something profound to say, (maybe I do have, we'll see:) but because I just wanted to be here again. Many things happened since June. Hubby and I went for a 2-week vacation in the beautiful island of Camiguin which was a very

Here again...

Wow, I have neglected this blog for a long time that I don't think anyone comes here anymore until I read a new comment on the previous entry. Well, my cop out for not writing anything here for months (Is it months?) was because I have been terribly busy as everyone else. Honestly, after I lost my baby, I associated blogging with heavy emotions. So since I did not want to 'feel' for a time, I stopped writing blogs (although I did write everything from teaching materials, my husband's sermon outlines, to scripts). But boy, did I miss blogging and the interaction with readers that sometimes comes with it when your friends feel oblige to acknowledge that they did read what you wrote (hehe). I decided to write something today not because I have something profound to say, (maybe I do have, we'll see:) but because I just wanted to be here again. Many things happened since June. Hubby and I went for a 2-week vacation in the beautiful island of Camiguin which was a very r

of ebays & iphones

I was scammed! One of the things I like about myself is the ability to think the best about people and always giving anyone the benefit of a doubt. But yesterday this has become a curse. I tried to buy a used phone in ebay and it turned out that the supposed seller was a scammer. He took my money (a considerable amount, yes) and never sent the product most likely cuz he doesn't have it in the first place. At first, I had this nagging doubt, and for three times I blurted out loud, "No Margie, don't bid on it!" But in the end, I did. I did asked the right questions, etc., etc., to try to make sure that the seller is genuine. He even gave me a valid serial number, a valid tracking number after he supposedly sent the product through Air21. He also told me the tracking number won't be valid until after 24 hrs, which is usually right, but after 12 hours, I checked the tracking number in the courier's website and I found out that it was the number for a package

of ebays & iphones

I WAS SCAMMED! Yes,

goodbye, JJ

This will be my last blog about JJ.   I was talking to a friend online awhile ago and the friend asked me how it's going.  I replied that I think I'm at last moving on, and I believe I am.  The hole in my heart will always be there, and part of me will always weep for my baby but now I've accepted the loss and trying very hard to live with it. Acceptance has been the most difficult; not because I could not accept that he is gone but because I was not sure if his death was not partly my fault.  I have had to be assured time and time again that I did everything I could, and be sure in myself that there was really nothing that I could have done to prevent the loss of JJ, before I was able to stop shedding tears.  There were five straight nights when I thought my head would explode for asking too many what ifs over and over again.  What if I rested more?  What if I stayed in bed instead of going to a garage sale and being on my feet for hours?  What if I've kept myself fr

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MY JOURNEY WITH JJ

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I woke up this morning with drier eyes unlike yesterday morning when everything I see around the house seemed to drive me to tears: The cushion where I use to seat talking to JJ as he starts growing in my womb, the food and drinks that Bong eats but I kept myself from consuming to make sure no harm however little will come near my baby, the strange smelling vitamins I had to close my eyes to take in, just so that baby will have all the nutrients he needs to develop; even the toilet bowl where I spent a lot of time sitting on, because I had to drink quarts and quarts of water so that baby will have enough water to drink so his lungs, and limbs and digestive system may develop perfectly, the seven pillows in my bed where I use to put my legs up and the veges in my fridge, food that I hate but I eat anyway for JJ -- all of these bring tears to my eyes. But today, my second day home with an empty womb, I felt that I am slowly adjusting to the lost. I only teared once today, compared to y

MY JOURNEY WITH JJ

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I woke up this morning with drier eyes unlike yesterday morning when everything I see around the house seemed to drive me to tears: The cushion where I use to seat talking to JJ as he starts growing in my womb, the food and drinks that Bong eats but I kept myself from consuming to make sure no harm however little will come near my baby, the strange smelling vitamins I had to close my eyes to take in, just so that baby will have all the nutrients he needs to develop; even the toilet bowl where I spent a lot of time sitting on, because I had to drink quarts and quarts of water so that baby will have enough water to drink so his lungs, and limbs and digestive system may develop perfectly, the seven pillows in my bed where I use to put my legs up and the veges in my fridge, food that I hate but I eat anyway for JJ -- all of these bring tears to my eyes. But today, my second day home with an empty womb, I felt that I am slowly adjusting to the lost. I only teared once today, compared to

Photo Album 2009-05-21

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in the postpartum ward

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After a flood scare from the two typhoons that passed by our province, I was all energized and enthusiastic because of the sunny Wednesday.  I was awakened by a visit from my eldest brother and was bragging to him my newly-acquired waterbed :) when my dad came over to the house and was looking for Sarah.  I asked why and he said he needs her to text someone to send a tricycle over to take my little nephew to the hospital.  My nephew's parents brought him down from the village at my request but after one night with us, he began to develop a fever.  So Bong volunteered to take them to the hospital.   Alone in the house, I forced myself to eat breakfast so I can take my meds and was waiting for Bong to come home so he can help me to the bathroom. (Yes, at this point, I need help getting out of bed and taking a bath cuz bending or anything that puts pressure on my lower abdomen hurts a lot and aggravates bleeding.  But while lying flat on my back, I suddenly felt my lower tummy tight

THIS STORMY VOYAGE 2

Right now, I am writing this update to avoid having to personally describe to anyone how we are doing right now.  I just don't know what to say anymore.  I always try to be brave when people ask me how I am doing and I end up trying to embellish on the facts to make the news sound more palatable and hopeful than the way I feel or the doctor observes.    I bought a waterbed today at a garage sale in Bagabag.  I am having difficulty turning to my sides, and getting up with the mattress on my bed.  The mattress seems to push the wrong muscles then I get all sore and numb from my waist down to my achilles tendon.  I hope the buoyancy of a waterbed will make it more comfortable for me.  We're still trying to figure out how to bring it home though.  The frame is too big.  We'll see. I went to the sonologist last Monday but again, there were already many patients lined up outside her door so I had to be rescheduled for the next day.  That was yesterday.  Seeing the ugly scars in

UPDATE: THIS STORMY VOYAGE

I had my sonogram yesterday and the doctor saw that the placental bleeding is now very minimal and the baby's heartbeat has decreased but still within normal range.  Praise the Lord and thank you for all your thoughts and prayers for these past months. However, the sonogram also revealed that I have a scanty and therefore inadequate amniotic fluid in my womb.  Amniotic fluid (AF) is the water that enables the development of the baby's lungs and limbs.  The baby drinks it and then excrete it as urine, the mother's lungs purifies it, returns it to the womb and the baby swallows it again, and the cycle goes on.  The AF is also responsible for the development of the baby's muscles and extremities as it facilitates movement.  Low amniotic fluid may be caused by a leaky membrane, high blood pressure, diabetes, dehydration, or worst-- defective kidneys or no kidneys at all of the baby.  Low AF usually results to miscarriage or stillbirth.  So after the sonogram, I came home a